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出彩的文书打动招生官获梦校哥伦比亚大学录取

2017-01-18来源: 啄木鸟教育浏览量:
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  学生情况

大学 广州某大学,城市规划 TOEFL/IELTS 91
平均成绩/GPA 3.21 GRE/GMAT 309

  录取结果(部分)

综合排名 大学英文名称 大学中文名称
5 Columbia University 哥伦比亚大学

  名师点评

  G学生的GPA不够高,标化成绩不够好,想要申请的专业包括建筑设计,城市设计,或者景观建筑。

  学生是“建筑行业世家”,父母都是学这一行做这一行的; 刚好那会美国收视榜前五的一个美剧叫做“How I Met Your Mother”, 里面的男主角Ted Mosby就是一个建筑师。于是决定从这个美剧开始入手来写文书,同时也可以合理的引入自己的家庭背景以及对自己的影响。

  "Women think that architects are hot.” This is what Barney Stinson told his best friend Ted Mosby in an American sitcom How I Met Your Mother. Not exactly, men do the same thing, and that’s how my parent got together, married, and gave birth to a Sagittarius boy full of vitality—it’s me. Looking to the vocational proportion in my family:my mother a reputable architect who designed the first super high-rise building in Shanxi Province, my father a distinguished professor in Civil Engineering, my aunt a structure design engineer, and my grandfather manager of aconstruction and engineering company who deals with construction his entire life, some children might get insane and rebel because it is absolutely necessary not to follow the path of tradition. Unfortunately, I am addicted to architecture, especially Urban Planning, which gives me the privilege someday to control the land use, the public transport, the building style and even the development of a city according to my taste, to some extent, just like what our mother nature does. And that is the most inspiring part of my proposed major: Urban Design.

  结尾的部分还要再次切题:

  So how to make my dream of being a splendid architect more achievable? There is no doubt that the fabulous guiding of your world acclaimed institution will tremendously increase that chance. And now the time is due for me to embrace a higher and broader stage to make strides in this domain and your favorable consideration means a world to me. Maybe one day, when I grow older, I can point proudly to my kids the awards and pictures on the wall, “Look, this is the picture of your dad graduating from university, and that medal is your dad winning the Pritzker Architecture Prize for designing that imposing museum. See, this is your dad getting The Excellent Entrepreneur for my prodigious contribution to the construction industry.”

  在最后一句也表明了自己的职业目标和理想,赢得过普利兹克建筑奖,并且创业成功。

  学生最后去到了自己最梦想的学校哥伦比亚大学。在拿到录取之后和学校沟通的过程中,学校直言:你的文书是我们这么多年来看过的最让人印象深刻以及打动人的。



本文关键字:哥伦比亚大学录取案例,研究生留学案例
编辑: wei
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